For Men, For Women, Sex Education

What To Do When He Can’t Get Hard During Sex

  • Posted by
problem getting an erection
27 Dec

If you have a problem getting an erection, it can feel like the end of your sex life if you get one but can’t keep up. Many of us know the feeling of not getting erections at all or losing them at a critical moment with a particular person. There are many different kinds of problems, from getting erection on demand to getting it, and losing it. This may mean that your partner may not have an erection that is hard enough to have sex with you, or that he may not be interested in sex because he needs to take medication to treat prostate cancer. It can mean that you are either unable or unable to last with an erection that is not as firm and not as long as you would like. Sources: 0, 3, 4, 14

When this happens to you, remember that you can still have fun and be intimate with your partner, even if he cannot get an erection. If you find it difficult to get erections when you are with a partner, there is nothing wrong with you or your relationship (see the previous section on sex therapy). Sources: 1, 7

If you think it is a sexual problem that your partner has, talk to him about it and agree to see a sex therapist together. If you have an erection that is hard enough for sex but you still have problems with PE, you should talk to your doctor. You may decide not to call the doctor if the erection problem does not bother your partner, and if you have concerns that it could be a problem with him with sexual problems, then you can also talk about it with a doctor. Sources: 5, 7, 13

Someone who specialises in couples may be best when it comes to a relationship problem, as their difficulties coping can sometimes be the case. If not, stress can certainly make your partner tough. Sources: 9, 12

To return to the whole stage fright thing: if your partner can’t get tough, everyone feels even more stressed during sex than if his stress stopped him from getting tough. If you get caught up in thoughts before sex, worry about whether he gets and maintains an erection, or are obsessed about whether it is big or heavy enough, or Whatever he might think of you, you are there and enjoying a pleasant feeling. By focusing on these worries, you can help yourself experience performance anxiety, which can stop sexual arousal and lead to a loss of erection. You can ejaculate faster than you would like, and you may have experienced erection loss before. All these factors can make it more difficult for men to get or maintain erections that are strong enough to penetrate them. Sources: 2, 6, 12

The only symptom of an erection problem is when you are unable or keep forgetting that your erection is firm enough to have sex with them. Sources: 13

Don’t make a big deal of it if he’s not heavy because he gets an erection, but don’t forget it first because you can’t. It could be easy to give him an excuse for not giving you the erection – he has GI problems, he may not want to open up, especially if there is simply no reason for him to leave you with him (especially as it only happens now and then). Sources: 9

If a man loses his erection during sex, manual or oral stimulation may be enough to restore it, according to the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists. 

 

Cited Sources

Newer How To Shave Your Private Parts
Back to list
Older Best Ways To Increase Your Sex Libido And Performance